I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE!

Last week, after they begged me all day, I took my kids ice skating. As you may already know, this is something I love to do but was grumbling about that particular day. Call it pure laziness, I just didn't feel like it.

After lacing up my skates and getting on the ice, I took a deep breath and remembered why I loved skating so much. The feeling of the blades as they carved my path began to mesmerize me as I rounded the rink. Revolution after revolution had a way of peeling off the stresses of the day/week. So many of my senses are engage on the ice... the wind in my hair, the sound of familiar rink-side music, along with the typical smells of popcorn and pizza coming from the concession stand. My sense of balance is always exercised, a healthy practice which brings long-tern benefits to all of us.

Growing up in the north, I had plenty of opportunity to hone my ice skating skills. Falling happened less and less as me and this frozen surface became more familiar with each other. Because I still have a love for this type of recreation, I am grateful for my years on the ice; it serves me well today.

Last week I had an accident that will briefly delay my figure-skating future for a few weeks: as I was exiting the ice, I under-estimated the wall at the doorway and slammed my fist into it, breaking my fifth metacarpal just below the knuckle. I noticed the severity of it when
I could not use my hand to remove my skates five minutes later. The next day it was confirmed by my doctor through an examination and x-rays that it was a broken bone.

After the shock passed and I was all alone with the Lord, I looked again at the x-rays and Psalm 139: 14 rose up in me declaring, "I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well." I not only knew those words for memory but needed to believe them. My hand, even in its broken state, was beautiful. God authored its amazing function and I needed to believe the Creator was capable of healing His creation.

I rest in His goodness as He completes the work He started, even if I messed it up. He is a good, good God and I choose to trust Him!

Cyberpsalmist

DARK, BUT LOVELY

I stood there for what seemed like forever, looking up at the glowing wonder in the evening sky... silvery blue, with a aura of mystery that surrounded its clean-cut edges. The words came off my tongue instantly as if I had no control of them...

"God, how is it that you can take something with such an ugly, desolate surface and use it to reflect pure light and beauty?"

I have gazed upon this lunar body a thousand times, but never in this frame of mind; His majesty and glory had overtaken me and I was stunned by it. Who in heaven can hang a lantern like that, allowing a soft glow to cover a sometimes brutal existence, but God. Who else can light our darkened paths with His still, small whisper of illumination?

I stand in awe of Him and the magnificence He gave us in the heavens, a reminder to a weary people that we too, are dark, yet lovely.

"I am dark, but lovely, like the daughters of Jerusalem, like the tents of Kedar, like the curtains of Solomon. "

Song of Solomon 1:5

For your listening pleasure, please go this link and let the words of this song sink deep.

http://www.myspace.com/sarahedwardsihop

CyberPsalmist

THERE IS A RIVER

The wooden bench which sat next to the edge of the mighty St. Johns River, was the perfect place to stop and rest along the Southbank. Hypnotized by the sound of the wake as it knocked against the bulkhead, I gazed out at the glistening waters before me. I am so blessed to be living near this beautifully wound waterway, spiraling through my coastal city.

There are nine major bridges that cross the river, all of them busily serving every extension of Jacksonville, moving people from one place to another. Under those bridges are houses, businesses, shipyards and restaurants; from fishing holes to athletic fields, the banks of the river welcome all to her shores. Traditions such as the 4th of July fireworks, annual lighting of the Christmas tree, as well as various boat parades and exhibits keep residents coming back year after year.

Like the divine grace of God, the river is smoothly flowing, bring all who rest beside her, sweet refreshing. Faithfully flowing, it neither overtakes us by monstrous waves nor meanders in a direction of its own choosing, but stays on course.

I sat and pondered the itinerary of the river. Uniquely flowing north instead of south ( just like that of the Nile,) its 310 miles of lazy liquid aquifer make it the longest river in Florida with a three mile expanse at the widest part. These brackish, cypress stained waters have been flowing long past the currents of time.

David speaks of yet a greater river . . . one whose waters bring pure delight to the body of Christ. Her tributaries are a life source to all who prefer the canals and creeks over the main stream and her main purpose is to refresh and renew. The Lord God inhabits the praises of His people, dwelling in the midst of those who worship His name.

If you have not paid a visit to the river recently, come and delight yourself at the waters edge. Allow the gleaming reflection of the Son to warm your soul and lift your spirit. Dip your feet and allow yourself to laugh with God again. He longs to enjoy you!

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy dwelling places of the Lord. God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved: God will help her when morning dawns. Psalm 46: 4&5

Cyberpsalmist

HIS TIMING IS PEFECT

The morning air briskly hit me in the face as I rounded the corner leaving the cul-de-sac. A sudden rush of wind nearly blew me off my 2-3 mile walking course. Tightening the drawstring of my hoodie to cover my exposed ears, I was reminded that spring had not yet sprung and we Floridians still have a few cold days left to deal with.

That's OK, because I know, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that I will soon have my fair share of hot days, wishing I could recall what a cool morning felt like. It won't be long until this transplanted Southerner is begging the weatherman to give her some kind of a contrast between one day and the next.

The heat index confronts me with the truth that the temperature is not what it seems, especially when the relative humidity gets factored in, a meteorological in-law I could easily do without. Fans move soggy air from one place to the next and the air-conditioners are set to positions such as "no mercy. Then once again, I will long for the days when I can sit next to my toasty buck stove, stoked full and blazing, complaining about the cold.

I've always loved the fact that seasons change and temperatures vary. Growing up in the North provided me with numerous ways to adapt to my ever-changing surroundings. From ice-skating to swimming, I managed to enjoy every quarterly equinox, grabbing the most from each. But I think the best part was knowing a new season was almost on it's way.

Life's seasons are similar. Just when I think I can't take any more, God has a wonderful way of modifying my environment. Sure, it's good to be content in whatever season we find ourselves in, but God is also preparing us for a change in scenery just the same.

He is never early and certainly never too late when it comes to making these necessary adjustments. In fact, I am always stunned by His impeccable timing. The funny thing is,

contrary to the seasons of the earth, I always forget this fact and begin to lose heart on the back side of the season I'm in.

Jeremiah 5:24 says, "Let us now fear the Lord our God, who gives rain in it's season, both the autumn rain and the spring rain, who keeps for us the appointed weeks of the harvest."

God Himself, has a grip on the seasons of my life. According to this truth, He brings me refreshing rains when I need them the most. He is not only in charge of my harvest, but keeps watch over it until it's mine to reap. His timing is perfect!

THE MYSTERY OF HIS LOVE

Remember Nancy Drew? How about the Hardy Boys? For those readers who have never heard of these characters, they were fictional amateur teenage detectives whose self-proclaimed duty was to solve mysteries of every kind. Both of these series lined our bookshelves growing up.

In my opinion, Nancy's life, although contemporary to mine at that time, had an element of intrigue which I coveted. She always seemed to be at the right place, at the right time. From witnessing a crime to gathering the facts, sleuthing added adventure to her everyday, hum-drum life. She was a success at the end of every spine.

So, just what does it take to be a successful detective? Would you have the boldness to carry out the tasks at hand? Asking the right questions and then listening to the answers; looking for holes as well as inconsistencies. Assertiveness along with confidence that you "have the right to know" plays a huge part; understanding your authority and then walking in it. Scrutinizing every detail and then readying yourself for the long haul . . . not quitting until every resource is exhausted; staying focused in hot pursuit until the file reads "Case Closed."

I have a Private Investigator who is in hot pursuit of me. He leaves no stone unturned, no lead undeveloped; every intricacy having value in solving my case. I ran for so many years but His love found me. He chased me with holy boldness and sought after me with an authority like no other. I questioned such a motive but realize now, His determination is directly connected to the sustainable love He offers me. Surely this kind of love will endure to the end.

This, to me, is a mystery . . . that Jesus knows my frame and my frailty; yet He still loves!

Cyberpsalmist- Chrissy Larson

MY HEART YEARNS FOR MORE

Who taught you how to love or did it come naturally? Sometimes I wish there was a class I could attend or better yet, send someone else to, that would teach me/them how to love better. Wouldn't it be great if just like traffic school, there existed a required course for emotional offenders arrested for breaking the laws of the heart?

From my earliest recollections, I was encouraged to show love and forgive wrongs; my siblings gave me plenty of opportunities. As I became more social, deep friendships taught me a lot about being true, trust, and the risks associated with handing my heart over to others.

I didn't take much time for me to hand my heart over to a boy that sat near me in middle school. I was convinced his feelings were mutual and that one day, he would marry me, only to find out he never shared my fantasy.

Almost all of my high school years were spent living out someone else's fantasy . . . I dated one guy who tied up every bit of my wonder years. Then one day, I woke up and said I had enough, but it was too late to recapture what was now in my rear view mirror.

Ahh, the lessons taught from that little piece of reflective 3X8 piece of glass! If I don't learn from the mistakes of my past, then those segments of life have wasted potential. Surely I could somehow use this dung pile for fertilizer.

But I serve a God who knows me inside and out and holds my destiny in the palm of His hand. His purposes for me are true and I was created to give Him glory. He specializes in turning my mourning into dancing; turning my sorrow into joy; giving me beauty for ashes. He gives me His praise for my pain. How can I deny such a love?

Oh, to have someone who knows you this way - what a gift! It makes my feet look for a dance floor; urges me to welcome the dawn of a new day; opens my nostrils to fragrances

I've never known and causes my weary heart to sing again.

I've learned so much from this academy and fear I am a life-long student. I have relinquished a license to love and be loved my way, only to attempt mastering the subject on His terms. Real love is awakened and now my heart yearns for more!

Cyberpsalmist

It's Huge - I'm Back!

What kind of a writer stays away from her blog for over six months? A pretty shabby one for sure. Geez - what a slacker! Will you forgive me for not penning all of my thoughts, dreams and aspirations?

So much has transpired since I last pecked away in this cyber diary . . . but I have decided to move forward instead of hash over the past. All I can say is life is good and Jesus is better. And rather than belabor the many excuses I could interject at this point, I will simply say, "I'm back!"

To all my readers, fans, admirers, lurkers and former students, I just want to say thank you for visiting while I was away. You showed your faithfulness even though I never even showed up. Wow! You are amazing!!!

So with gratefulness in my heart and repentance in my spirit, I press on to the exclamation "mark of the high calling in Christ Jesus." My desire, as my title states, is to reflect, knowing that objects of all sorts really do appear larger than they are if viewed through a rear view mirror.

Is that a bad thing? On the contrary! I firmly believe that every day I am allowed to live and breath is significant, nothing happens by chance, and I want to die doing something I love. These are objects I have had the privilege to reflect on and they appear huge to me. Life is too short to exist without passion.

This has always been a place for not only me to express myself, but you as well. I appreciate any and all of you comments more than you know.

These are my thoughts . . . a penny for yours.

Chrissy/Cyber Psalmist

Science Camp 2009

Click here to view these pictures larger

Apron's Cooking School 2009

Click below to read the article featured in the Florida Times Union. There you will find photos as well as a video of Lily in action at Publix Cooking School. 

Summer camp sizzles when you're cooking | Jacksonville.com

Shared via AddThis

YOU ASK, WHERE HAVE I BEEN?

Well, if you have a minute or two, I'll tell you. I've been packing, unpacking, and doing laundry!

After my last blog entry, I left for Orlando and attended the FPEA Homeschool Convention with my two youngest kids, Garrett and Lily. The seminars were fabulous and every type of book, curriculum, kit, and computer product was at my fingertips; each vendor ready to swipe my credit card.

When the convention ended, we were off to the University of Central Florida, Orlando, where the three of us attended an incredible science camp, hosted by Aurora Lipper of Supercharged Science. There Garrett and Lily worked on making robots, lasers, roller coasters and various chemical mixtures, including the combination of diet cola and Mentos. The rest is messy history. (See the photos in a previous post.)

Three days after we came home, I was on a plane for Kansas City. Not only did I get to hang out with my daughter who lives there as a prayer missionary with the International House of Prayer, I attended a very hands-on Worship Symposium. Our class had about 35 participants with 11 nations of the world represented. God truly unifies His people through worship.

The next week, after I arrived home, my summer taxi service began. Lily started Apron's Cooking School (in the chefs hat on far right) with Publix, where she created full meals from Monday through Friday. It included Italian, Asian, Mexican, and American cuisine. The doggy bags were fantastic. (Read the article and watch the video in the recent post.)

The next week we went back and forth from the Cummer Art Museum, where Lily had a very enriching experience with everything from clay and painting to paper mache. I think I finally satisfied her creative hunger as she showed no signs of boredom.

In the meantime, Garrett started getting involved with Boy Scout Troop 252. This has been the best thing for him, being the outdoorsman that he is. They camp on a regular basis, and are constantly working on merit badges, which is now consuming his time instead of other mindless activities. One of the things his troop did to raise money for camp this year was pick hundreds of gallons of fresh blueberries in Georgia. I've never seen this active child so tired!

It was all worth it though. The following week, the troop headed to North Carolina for one week of Boy Scout Camp fun. The adventure spirit in him was (temporarily) satisfied and he came home dirty and tired.

Just before he left, Lily and my husband took off for Wisconsin where they went on an "Old Home Tour." She had been asking her dad about his upbringing, her deceased as well as living relatives, and the old homestead in Wisconsin. Instead of telling her the details, he decided that showing her would be more meaningful. The trip was intricately put together by the Lord as their steps were perfectly ordered. On the plane ride home, she leaned over to her daddy and said, "This is a trip I'll never forget. Thanks, Dad."

If you haven't figured it out by now, I had exactly one week to myself. I slept in, watched movies, read until I couldn't, cleaned, did laundry and hurt my knee. That reduced my activity to more self-pampering, which included a pedicure before they all came home.

Lily was home for one night and left for 4-H camp the next week. Garrett left for a youth camp in Kansas City four days later. 18 days away from home is a long time, but I know the Lord will encounter him as he attends the Awakening Teen Camp, designed especially for this age group. (Plus the fact that he will get to chill with his sister, who is a counselor there.)

Lily is home for now but starts Sewing Camp on Tuesday. There she will learn the basics as well as make a pair of pajama pants. Garrett comes home in August, just in time for Boy Scouts to resume.

I look forward to having everyone together again but have to say, while taking a huge breath, I am forever grateful to the Lord for the opportunities He has given us. Compared to others, this has truly been the most enriching summer of all. We have enjoyed meeting new friends along with going to different places. Our hearts are full and our memories are forever.

I just wish I could keep up the laundry all of this has created!

How about you? Tell me about your summer . . .

CARVING OUT A NAME FOR MYSELF

By Chrissy Larson

I'm not sure if I ever explained the whole, "Cyberpsalmist" thing.

When I first took the Blog Writing Course that I so highly recommend, I was advised by my instructor to choose a name other than my own, that described me in some way. This is usually called a pen name or pseudonym. Considering the possibilities, I thought about the many hobbies I enjoy, such as sewing, scrap booking, camping, travel, movies . . . the list goes on and on.

Drawing a blank, I explored the friendly nicknames of my childhood, as well as not-so-nice sticks and stones names I was called. Still, nothing interesting came up.

After allowing a few days to let my mind ramble, I remembered a name that's followed me for quite some time. In my early years as a new christian, I always had a desire to express myself not only verbally, but musically. I would sit before the Lord (and still do) singing my little songs to Him. Some of them were for the moment and others stuck with me. Eventually, I became more involved, developing as a psalmist.

Don Corey Washington best describes a psalmist as "a sculptor who uses air as his medium instead of clay, metal, or stone. Music is his tool instead of a hammer and chisel. He 'sculpts' the air into an 'atmosphere' that directly corresponds to the moving of the Holy Spirit." The training for this is most unusual; there are no books or charts, practice hours are long and go generally into the wee hours of the morning; there is no recital and you play for an audience of One.

If Psalmist describes the "who" part of the name, then "Cyber" describes the "where." I realize that I am not able to convey one single musical note across the Internet, but my prayer is that the thoughts I pen will carry His tune and change the atmosphere of the World Wide Web.

If you had to give yourself a pen name, what would it be and why?

PUT ME TO THE TEST

by Chrissy Larson

I have a love/hate relationship with tests. They certainly serve a purpose, in that the results generally prove something to somebody.

Last week, I had eight vials of my precious blood go to a lab. A technician somewhere examined it, looking for stuff (in other words, I'm not sure what.) Because I am frequently involved in research projects, I may never learn the results, unless they are not good. In my case, no news is good news.

That same week, I had to administer a test or final exam to 14 high school students. Personally, it was less painful than giving blood, but some of them probably would have taken the needle instead. It was my way of testing their knowledge to see if they walked away with what I was pounding home, week after week. Napoleon Dynamite surely would agree with me in saying this class taught them "skills."

Next week, my younger children will have the opportunity to participate in year-end testing. Some folks prepare ahead by having their kids study or brush up with test prep booklets. I, on the other hand, send them in cold turkey, assuming that if they didn't learn it by now, it's too late. (Not to say that preparing is a bad thing; on the contrary.)

My kids asked me why they had to take tests and I think my answer shocked them. I explained the results were not for me, but for them; that their scores would be compared to other children their age on a national scale. I also told them I was NOT concerned about the results; their score did not matter to me as much as it should matter to them.

At that moment, their disposition changed from fear to freedom. I was not the mean taskmaster (looking for a reason to ground them for the entire summer) they thought I was. It was a new feeling for me, as the weight of this responsibility shifted from mine to theirs. This is not to say that I am fully responsible for their education . . . it's just that I want them to own it for themselves.

Jesus wants us to understand this concept too. James 1:2-4 says, "Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way."(The Message)

There is liberty in facing the truth. When we avoid it, the chains of bondage grip us all the more. I suppose this is why James called testing a gift; he understood Jesus when He said, " And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." (John 8:32)

As I begin to fully understand God's motives, I am less likely to cower upon hearing Him call me to His exam room. I've come to learn the benefits and willingly utter, "Go ahead . . . put me to the test."

What do YOU think?

A WORLD OF DIFFERENCE

by Chrissy Larson

Soon, we'll all be putting last-minute touches on another chapter in our books. It's hard to believe an entire school year has come and gone, yet it has.

I remember my mixed emotions around August of 2008 . . . I wondered how my family would fare, coming into a new co-op, after having been rooted in one for the last 16 years. But God was very clear in letting me know that change was coming.

My dad thrives on change too. He loved to buy old houses and fix them up, only to sell them and move on to another. My mother and I counted how many times she moved since she got married and it was astounding! (I think it was close to 15 times and he is NOT in the military.) She never intends to move again.

It's fun to open the door of your new home and look for what will be your bedroom. But it's not any fun to open your heart all over again to perfect strangers, hoping to find someone who will allow you to enter their already established social world. I had a fairly easy time making friends but I hated the usual awkwardness.

No sooner did I jump that hurtle, he was either talking about another move or it was a natural time to change schools (elementary to middle or middle to high school.) Nothing could be more inconvenient.

But, who ever said life was convenient. I've learned a lot through it all . . . I'm not afraid of new situations; my confidence is in Him and not myself; I'll lead OR follow, whichever is needed; I don't know a stranger; I'm not afraid to open a new door or shut an old one; I don't burn any bridges AND always try to finish well. (That's when it's the hardest to maintain integrity.) One last thing: it pays to be obedient, even when sacrifice is involved.

Sometimes I get weary and wish I could put my pen down. I'm tired of putting last-minute touches on chapters . . . I just want to finish the book! I've concluded that as long as I have breath in my lungs, I'm not done. Usually, He brings a word of encouragement or allows me to see His hand on my life. My true significance is jolted and I get my focus back.

I'm still not satisfied with what I've done and know I still need to put my mark on this life. The impression I've made is not deep enough. For those who know anything about sewing, it's like having a pattern that repeatedly needs cutting out. Jesus is at the core of every being; yet there are so many who refuse to look within.

So, should you continue to visit this cite, I warn you: I'll drive you to excellence hoping you will be driven to your knees in humility. I hope you remember some of the words I've penned, yet I never want the enemy to forget the threat you and I are to his schemes. It's my desire that you know the intent of the Almighty God and what He has for you. Your future is amazing!!!

My plan is to keep pushing and prodding, keep wishing and waiting, and yes, keep reeling and writing until you see. Whatever it takes, no matter the cost, in spite of the inconvenience, whether I move on or I stay, I intend on making a difference!

How do you intend to make a difference?

WHAT DOES LOVE LOOK LIKE?

by Chrissy Larson

Just when I thought my eyes exhausted all the possibilities, God amazed me.

Over 30 years ago, I spotted love in the gleam of a man's eye. He was young, independent, and blonded by the sun. The love, I noticed, was not directed to me as much as it was lavished on the Lord. This made me love him all the more.

Then his love gave me a son and I was raptured all over again. I felt like a Queen put in charge of a royal prince. The first time I laid my tired eyes on him, he gave me a smile and a coo that took my breath away. He grew to be my best friend; someone in whom love could trust.

Five years later, the look of love took on a feminine side. She eased into my life with a redeeming quality that refreshed my passion and cultivated my wonder. Love looked exciting and mirrored me.

Six years and two lost-loves later, the unexpected look of love whisked me away and captured my heart once again. This time, the neediness was intoxicating. We mutually met on equal terms and my appreciation for him grows every day.

Last, but not least, the Lord had mercy on me and extended His grace in the form of an angel. Her look of love was that of prophecy and promise fulfilled. This kind of love stretched from my past to my future.

But today, love took me by surprise. It's now coupled together with treasures a princess brought to my prince, including the richness of her heritage. Along with the gleam he inherited from his father, and the depths of my eternal gaze, this blended little one emerged with 10 fingers and 10 toes, skin as soft as silk and the face of an angel. Her cry is for the Lord of Hosts and her voice will be heard among the nations, preparing the way for her generation. With her full lips and button nose, she ransacks our hearts and steals a grand new love now awakened.

Today, this is what love looks like.


(Maggie Elizabeth Larson)

There IS a HOPE!

by Matt Malone

1 Corinthians 15:55 "O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?"

Easter Sunday is a very important Sunday, but why? It's certainly not about bunnies or getting some good ole Easter candy. THE TRUE meaning of Easter is about the resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Three days earlier, Jesus was beaten and crucified on a cross for the payment of our sins. But since He died, Jesus' disciples thought that all hope was gone, for He was their hope and now He had died. They forgot what He said about Him rising from the dead. When Peter and the other disciple saw the linen cloths lying in that tomb, they believed, and there was a hope again! Now there would always be hope! Praise God!

Ever been scared of death? I know I have. We shouldn't be, should we? Just as Christ was raised from the dead, so will His believers and death has no power over us. Something that God has really been teaching me lately is that He is our all in all; He is our hope and in Him we find eternal life. Since He is all these things, then the world has nothing to offer that is greater than this. He's also been teaching me that even in the worst of times, He is still right there with me, even when it doesn't seem like it. During our trials, that's when we should draw nearer to God. If we do, He will surely reward us and make us stronger in our faith. For He puts us through trials not to harm us, but simply because He loves his children and wants them to learn as they go and succeed in life. The best is yet to come.

So with all this said, my questions are . . .
Who is Jesus to you?
Do you find joy in the resurrection?
What does Easter mean to you?
What matters more to you, Easter or Christmas?

There's really not a right or wrong answer, I just want your personal opinion :-P.
I encourage all of you to read 1 Corinthians 15 (all of it.)