A Must ReadI recently had to move on in an area of my life. Everyone kept asking me what was "wrong?" I guess it was either my mood, facial expressions, or the fact that I feel unsociable at times that gave them cause to wonder. What I had to get friends and family to realize was, it wasn't about what's "wrong" with me, it was about what was "right."
Generally, I'm a pretty happy, easy going person. Granted, my Italian temper goes from 0-90 in two seconds but I calm down just as fast as I light up. While I can't give myself an excuse to be angry and sin, I do recognize this trait to be somewhat cultural. Italians have been described in many places as fiery and feisty... short fused and intense. On the other hand, we are passionate people, full of mercy. My mood can obviously change like the direction of the wind, happening any time and not necessarily generated by mood.
My mother said that even as a baby, my mood was happy. Her most difficult task was feeding me - I would rather smile than drink my bottle. I don't notice if I'm smiling or not since for me, the expression has nothing to do with how I'm feeling. I guess my face doesn't know the difference. Then there are those blank days... it's like when the computer tower is on but you forget to flip on the monitor; everything is running like it should, only know one else can see the screen. For someone like me, it's perceived as "something is wrong."
Not only am I misunderstood, I'm not aloud to be unsociable. My husband finds this the most difficult trait of mine to comprehend. He is used to seeing me on a stage (as well as partly responsible for putting me there) which to him is synonymous with sociable. What he hasn't grasped is although I have no trouble communicating with large crowds of people, I am more comfortable in smaller groups. Sometimes this doesn't translate well.
My life is an open book so don't just look at the cover.
I've been known to laugh when I'm suppose to be serious and cry when I'm happy. Whats more, my reactions are not always what others expect. Yet deep inside, all is as it should be and God has complete control of my life. Whether it be an inherited disposition, a blank stare, or bashful demeanor, it's possible to read me wrong.When are you misread?
Cyberpsalist
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8 comments:
Chrissy, we are so much alike in so many ways. No wonder our children tell each other they grew up with the same Mom who just habited different bodies! (chuckle)
My heritage is likely 90% Scot-English and my personality exhibits the best of what is British... stoicism with the stiff upper lip to push forward leaving difficulties, negatives and distractions behind. Because this is the strong stream that runs through me, I am most misunderstood when I need, want, am desiccated for some sort of comfort, support, encouragement, and compassion. It is then that others ask me "What's wrong with you!" It definitely shows in my demeanor and on my face. My children don't understand it and my husband hates it. They just don't understand how to respond.
All that said, the disparity of understanding has trained me to go to the One Who is Comfort itself... Jesus. I ALWAYS get comfort and clarity there in His lap... some much needed rest, too.
Yes, Patrice, we ARE alike in many ways, especially the way we find our way to the One who knows us oh so well. It is He alone who interprets us correctly and when He says, "I understand," we have full confidence He does! With that kind of revelation, who needs another opinion?
When I am aggravated with my work or school it comes off as I am an angry person. When ever I go out after work or an aggravating day of school it looks like i am just an angry person. I always try now to keep myself in check with my attitude whenever I go out. So, when I meet new people they don't think I am an angry person.
Emily,
Good advice! It makes sense to look in the mirror before going out in public so you can paste on a smile. The one good thing about that is it keeps people from asking, "What's wrong?" when you're fine or it's really too much to answer. :) :) :)
(You can cut and paste one of mine on if you need one to borrow)
As you know i am a VERY sarcastic/facetious person and i think that people who ether don't know me or at least don't know me well believe that i am being mean when i am really just being funny. so i think that is when i am misunderstood. :)
Thomas, I have seen your sarcastic side and you are right, if people don't know you, they might think you're ready to duke it out in the parking lot. But to me, your polite disposition supersedes any negative opinion I could ever have of you :)
Alot of times people mistake my intense focus and concentration as general grumpiness. For example, one time at church i was playing the congas and afterwards Priscilla came up to me and told me that while drumming, i looked as if i was having the worst time of my life. I find it interesting how much people can read into facial expressions sometimes.
Walter,
Don't you just wish you could wear a mask sometimes? Concentration doesn't always look like it's enjoyable, does it :)
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